Saying Your Sorry is Not a Sign of Weakness

I was watching NCIS the other day, which is one of my favorite TV shows. I like it because it is humorous and entertaining. I think it is one of the top TV series on the network. In one particular show (I am not sure which) Gibbs, who is the fearless leader of the NCIS crime unit, makes the remark to his subordinate saying, “Don’t say you’re sorry, it is a sign of weakness!” I couldn’t believe it. Although I love Gibbs as a character, this statement could not be farther from the actual truth. Saying that you’re sorry, is not a sign of weakness, it is a sign of strength! It takes courage to say that you are sorry to someone for something you did that was wrong. It takes strength to admit that you made a mistake and that you own up to it. It is taking responsibility for your actions. It is letting another person know that you are sorry for your mistake and will try to do better.

Now I know that NCIS is just a TV show (and I think a good one), but many younger and some older viewers look up to the character of Gibbs, and may take to heart what he is saying about being sorry as a sign of weakness. I think it is important to realize that it takes strength to say you are sorry to someone. It is a very hard thing to do! You are admitting that you made a mistake and are not perfect. And that is not a sign of weakness; it is part of being human. We are not perfect. We make mistakes and sometimes hurt other people. Then we need to say we are sorry. I think it is very important to strive to be the best we can be in this world. But we do make mistakes and we should try to learn from them, and move on. Let us practice the Lord’s Prayer, “Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us”.

Christmas and The Winter Solstice

The Winter Solstice occurs when the sun descends to its lowest point in the sky and is the shortest day of the year. “Solstice” literally means to “stand still”. At the winter solstice, the sun moves into the astrological sign of Capricorn. Here marks the beginning of winter. For those of us in the northern climates, the snow begins to fall and cover the countryside. Of course this time period is celebrated throughout the West as Christmas. The majority of Christians celebrate the birth of Christ at this time of year. Prior to Christianity, the Pagans celebrated the Winter Solstice. The Pagans held that this time of year was sacred as it was the rebirth of the sun or light force. It is the time when the light or day force begins to grow again. There is an interesting correspondence between the Winter Solstice and the birth of Christ. Paramhansa Yogananda, who was one of the first Yogis to bring Yoga to the West, held that Christ Consciousness was something that was inherent in all people. It is a level of consciousness that everyone has the capacity to realize. Christ Consciousness is that inner light of realization that Jesus brought to fruition within himself. Through yogic practices and spiritual development, we all have the capacity to realize the Christ Consciousness. Jesus is not the only Son of God, we are all Sons of God. Jesus said it himself, “Do ye not know that ye are Gods”.

The Winter Solstice is the darkest time of the year. It is also when the seeds of light and renewal are born. It is the time of year when the sun is resurrected and begins to rise again. For most Yogis this is the real meaning of Christmas. It is the celebration of the birth of the inner light of Self-Realization.

There are many interesting rituals that are done at the Winter Solstice. The majority of them have their roots in the Pagan tradition. Most everyone is familiar with the Christmas tree. I have enjoyed this ritual since childhood and loved the whole act of going out in selecting a proper Christmas tree and decorating it with special care. Now this practice originated from an old Pagan tradition where pine trees were brought into the house to dispel evil spirits and as a celebration of the life force that continues through the depth of winter. The symbolism of the Christmas tree is very interesting. From an astrological perspective, trees are ruled by the planet Saturn. Saturn is also the planetary ruler of Capricorn which is the sign that the sun enters during this time of year. One of the ways to get in touch with the natural energy of this time of year is to bring something into your household related to the energy of Saturn. Trees are ruled by Saturn and bringing a tree into your house helps you tune into the energy of the season. It was also under a Bodhi tree that Buddha experienced enlightenment.

During this current age of the Kali Yuga, I think our culture has lost sight of the true meaning of Christmas. It has become very materialistic with an emphasis on buying and receiving gifts. I don’t think there is anything wrong with giving and receiving presents, but when it becomes the focal point then the spiritual meaning is lost. The Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens is a great story for the real meaning of Christmas. I think everyone I know as seen this movie many times but I watch it every year as a great reminder to what is really important. In a nutshell, Scrooge is portrayed as a stingy, self-centered person who is mired in the depths of materialism. His only concern is for himself and monetary achievement. He is then visited by three spirits of the past, present and future. He undergoes a spiritual awakening and self-realization. He comes to understand the true meaning of Christmas and carries it in his heart everyday. Like Scrooge, I find it very easy to get caught up in materialism and past karma. There are bills to pay, children to support, and jobs to take care of in order to make a living. Things are not easy. But it is important to remember our spiritual center because that is where all nourishment and fulfillment ultimately comes from.

This time of year is celebrated by the Hermetic Yogi as a Wish Festival. Like the Wish Festival celebrated at the Summer Solstice, we again plant seeds or wishes that we hope for fruition as the Sun rises again. Many people celebrate by placing their wishes upon their Christmas tree with the prayer of peace and goodwill for all humankind.

Spiritual Awakening and Relationships

Having a spiritual awakening can definitely change a relationship drastically. A good example of this can be seen in the movie, Close Encounters of the Third Kind? Do you remember what happened to Richard Dreyfuss in that popular movie? Before he had seen UFO’s, he was a relatively normal person, and had a good relationship with his loving wife and family. Then all hell broke loose! One day, Richard saw UFO’s and it completely changed his life. He became completely obsessed with unidentified flying objects. He felt called by some higher power to rendezvous to Devil’s Tower for a close encounter with aliens from another world. His wife and family could not understand what was happening to him. He lost his job and his friends. And his wife finally ended up taking the children and moving away.

That is how a spiritual awakening can change a relationship! Richard Drefuss was being guided by a psychic connection to the aliens that he did not understand, nor did his wife and family. Now of course, this was just a movie, but it shows what a revelation can do to someone. And this affects everyone around them, especially their close relationships! For Richard Dreyfuss, his spiritual revelation was a psychic contact with a higher developed civilization. For someone else, a spiritual awakening could be the development of psychic ability, an out of body experience, a divine experience, a miracle or self-realization. But the result can be a complete change of personality. A person may no longer enjoy the same interests, the same foods, and the same friends. Their life can be turned upside down because of a new awareness. This happens to many people who have had a spiritual awakening. For example, the alcoholic who finds new meaning in life through AA, and is no longer interested in drinking. He or she may no longer hang out with their old friends, who liked to party and get drunk. Or the drug addict that finds a spiritual awakening in meditation. He or she no longer needs drugs to get high. They have found a better way! And their life changes, along with their relationships. They will probably no longer hang out with their drug friends, and will begin to associate with new friends who have similar interests. Similar scenario’s happen with couples in relationships, when one person undergoes a spiritual transformation. A person may no longer see the world the same way, and their partner can have a difficult time understanding all the changes that may be happening to them.

Is there anything that can help a relationship where someone is undergoing such a spiritual awakening? I think there is. Most couples should first try going to a psychologist or family counselor. This would be important to make sure that a person was not having a psychotic episode. It would also help their partner to better understand what they were going through.

The other consideration is to seek the counsel of a mystic, psychic or spiritual counselor. A good psychic might have a better bead on what the person is actually going through. A psychologist would be helpful in clarifying a person’s emotions and thought processes, but a mystic or psychic would be better at determining if a person was having a spiritual awakening or paranormal experience. A psychic would be able to tune into a person’s inner experience and determine the cause of their experience. For example, a psychic could help determine if their experience was caused by unresolved issues from previous lives, communication from spirits on another dimension, aliens from another world or a divine awakening. A psychic or mystic would not only be able to help the person better understand what was happening to them, but also help their partner to accept and understand the experience. Better understanding and acceptance will help the couple adjust to a divine awakening that will ultimately bring them closer in their relationship.

One final thing to be aware of is that when someone has a spiritual awakening within, it will bring about change from without. This may cause a lot of problems with friends, jobs, and relationships. I had a close friend, who after a spiritual awakening, began to take meditation classes, yoga and tai chi. She really changed quite dramatically. But her spouse could not handle it. He liked to drink and party on the weekends. And they had done this together for quite some time. Now she was no longer interested in drinking or all night parties. She wanted time for reflection and meditation. She became aware that there was more to life. Her husband could not understand or accept this. He wanted the same woman that he married; the one that liked to drink and have a good time. She was no longer that person. And he hated her for it. They tried counseling, but he was just hoping that she would change back to her old self. Well, that did not happen. And when it did not, he became abusive. She was forced to leave him. And it was best for both of them. He found someone new that did like to drink and party. She became involved with a spiritual group of friends that encouraged her new direction in life.

It is important to remember that your friends and environment have quite an impact on you psychically. More than most people realize. When you have a spiritual awakening, you are like a new seedling. That seedling needs to be nurtured and cared for to develop. If you allow negative people into your garden, they will trample over your seedlings, and damage your development. So it is good to be around other people who will nourish and support your spiritual development.

The Mystical Experience of Enlightenment

Do you see the light? Enlightenment is one of those terms that mean a lot of different things to many different people. In the Yogic, Buddhist and Mystical traditions, one of the primary goals in meditation is enlightenment. Enlightenment is notably characterized by the story of the Buddha. Before Buddha was the Buddha, he was known as Siddhartha, which very interestingly means, "One who achieves his aim". The story goes that Siddhartha was a prince having been born into a royal family. He was raised in wealth and luxury. He knew very little about life outside of the palace or about the lives of the common people. When he became older, he wanted to learn more about his kingdom and the people who lived there. He began to travel and learn about the pain and suffering of the many people around his village. He became disillusioned about the life of royalty and began to search for truth. He learned various meditative practices and after many years, experienced enlightenment. Enlightenment is basically the English translation of the Buddhist word, bodhi; which also means to awaken or to know. Buddha means “One who has awakened". To be awakened is to become completely transformed to the ultimate level of reality where there is no dualism, no pleasure or pain, no suffering and no ego. One has become liberated and no longer tied to the wheel of samsara or the cycle of birth, suffering, death and rebirth.

The Yogic tradition also embraces the goal of enlightenment. Patanjali, who is considered the Father of Yoga, maintained that the final goal of yoga was liberation from samsara through moksha. Moksha is derived from the Sanskrit root, muc which means to “let loose” or “release” and is the liberation from all illusion, suffering and pain. Moksha is the release from the worldly conception of the self or the ego, and the realization of the true nature of the self (self-realization). It is an experience of bliss and joy that is no longer tied to pleasure and pain, and where normal duality is transcended through union with God/Spirit. Patanjali outlined an eightfold process whereby the Yogi can achieve moksha through purification and meditation. The final steps consist of deep meditation into Samadhi where the individual transcends the limitations of the ego and merges into the Infinite source of all being.

The mystical practices of many different religious traditions talk about enlightenment. Enlightenment is derived from the Latin word, illuminare which means “to make light” or in our case, “to make light within”. Enlightenment is considered a mystical experience whereby one perceives inner truth or divinity. There are many different accounts on the experience of enlightenment. From Christian mysticism, where enlightenment is the experience of direct union with God (Of course, Jesus; St. Paul ,St. John of the Cross, Meister Eckhart, Thomas Kempis….) to Quaker mysticism where one experiences the inner light of God within the soul, to the Hermetic Tradition where initiates are taught to expand their consciousness to God consciousness, to the mystical revelations of the Sufi Tradition, to the Kabbalistic mysticism of the Jewish religion and to the Taoist mysticism of Lao Tzu.

In my own meditative practices, I have had many experiences of illumination. In deep meditation, I can actually see through my inner eye or vision, a subtle light that illuminates from within. It is like someone has turned on a light bulb inside my head which radiates all around me. (It’s interesting that many Christian saints are depicted with halos around their head indicating the divine light) There have been meditations where I have experienced this light and later opened my eyes thinking; ‘maybe it is the sun shining in through the window’. But it was not the sun or any kind of exterior lighting, but the inner light. I have spoken with many mystics who also have experienced this inner light. I think it is connected with the process of enlightenment, but not the goal of enlightenment. Although I have had many mystical experiences, I have not experienced the bodhi of Buddhism, the moksha of Yoga or the divine union with God in Christian mysticism. I do know that this experience exists from deep within my soul, but I have not experienced it directly. So I think that enlightenment is really a process. Through different meditative, mystical and religious practices, we can come closer and closer to the real goal. And that goal is actually not a goal at all (although a goal while you are going there), but is the realization of All that is or Divinity or what the Hindu’s call, Om Brahma Smi, translated, “I am one with God”.


For a complete listing of Christian mystics, see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Christian_mystics, also see: http://www.rainbowbody.net/HeartMind/Yogasutra.htm, http://www.katinkahesselink.net/other/enlightenment.html, http://www.themystica.com/mystica/articles/m/mysticism.html.

A Day in the Life of a Meditator

Now is the time to meditate. I sit in my favorite lotus posture and begin to calm my body and mind. Just as I start to relax, the phone rings. Darn! I answer the phone and some guy tries to sell me life insurance. I tell him; no thank you and hang up the phone. So, I return to my meditation position. Just as I begin to settle down, I hear a knocking at my front door! I get up and go to the door. Someone has just left a flyer at my doorstep. As I walk back to my meditation space, the phone rings again. It is my brother. I tell him I will call him back. This time I pull the cord off the phone. Jesus, all these interruptions! I again resume my meditation posture. Now I am a bit agitated and I have to concentrate on calming my mind. I begin to watch my breathing and after a few minutes, start my meditation practice(mantra). Thoughts arise in my consciousness like little bubbles vying for my attention. One thought concerns a problem at work. I spend (what seems like an eternity) engaging in a daydream-like panorama of dealing with the problem at work. It seems a coworker is unhappy with how I have been treating her. She came to me with a problem on one of her cases. I helped her the best I could and she kept asking for more direction. I told her to visit me and I would gladly........Oh, then I remember; I am meditating, the bubble of my daydream panorama bursts. I resume my meditative practice once again. Then, suddenly, I have to sneeze! I firmly hold my nose so I don't sneeze. That would totally blow away my meditative state. But, of course I sneeze all over the place. I get up and grab some tissue. Once again, I return to my lotus posture. I resume my meditative practice. My breathing begins to slow down and my mind is calm. I am determined to go deeper in my meditation and let all my concerns go. Deeper and deeper. My mind is quiet now. I am feeling at peace. A feeling of joy begins to pervade my being and I become light, like the air. A glow begins to radiate near the top of my head (Sahasara chakra) and with my inner eye, I can see an inner light. Little dances of ecstacy begin to permeate my consciousness. I am feeling happy and content inside. Peace. Then something tells me it is time to end my meditation. I reverse the meditation process and begin to awake, saying a prayer of thanks to the Universal Spirit.

Modern Day Mystic

What is a Modern Day Mystic? Well, first of all a modern day mystic is a mystic. According to the Wikipedia, “a mystic is one who practices mysticism”; "Mysticism (comes from the Greek, mystikos, an initiate of a mystery religion) It is the pursuit of communion with, identity with, or conscious awareness of an ultimate reality, divinity, spiritual truth, or God through direct experience, intuition, instinct or insight. Mysticism usually centers on a practice or practices intended to nurture those experiences or awareness."

The essential part of being a mystic is the direct experience of the Divine, whether through personal experience, intuition or insight. Mystical experience shares this common thread through all religions. There are Catholic mystics, i.e., St John of the Cross, St. Teresa of Avila; Islamic mystics and the Sufis, i.e., Jalaladdin Rumi, Kahil Gibran; Hindu mystics, such as; Patanjali, Paramahansa Yogananda, Sri Aurobindu; Taoist mystics, i.e., Lao Tsu, Chang Tzu and many others.

According to Evelyn Underhill, there is a process of mystical experience that she delineates into five stages:

"First is the awakening, the stage in which one begins to have some consciousness of absolute or divine reality. The second stage is one of purgation which is characterized by an awareness of one's own imperfections and finiteness. The response in this stage is one of self-discipline and mortification. The third stage, illumination, is one reached by artists and visionaries as well as being the final stage of some mystics. It is marked by a consciousness of a transcendent order and a vision of a new heaven and a new earth. The great mystics go beyond the stage of illumination to a fourth stage which Underhill, borrowing the language of St. John of the Cross, calls the dark night of the soul. This stage, experienced by the few, is one of final and complete purification and is marked by confusion, helplessness, stagnation of the will, and a sense of the withdrawal of God's presence. It is the period of final "unselfing" and the surrender to the hidden purposes of the divine will. The final and last stage is one of union with the object of love, the one Reality, God. Here the self has been permanently established on a transcendental level and liberated for a new purpose. Filled up with the Divine Will, it immerses itself in the temporal order, the world of appearances in order to incarnate the eternal in time, to become a mediator between humanity and eternity."

Not all mystics go through all these stages of mystical experience, nor do they have to undergo them in any kind of special order. But Underhill's depiction of mystical experience is a good description of what many mystics go through. The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali is also a good outline of the process of mystical experience. Basically Patanjali discusses eight steps of mystical yoga practice. They consist of: Yama, Niyama, Asana, Pranayama, Pratyahara, Dharana, Dhyana and Samadhi. The first five steps of: Yama, Niyama, Asana, Pranayama and Pratyahara are ways to purify the mind and body, preparing one for deep mediation. This would be similar to the awakening and purgation stages of Underhill's mystical experience. The last three steps of the Yoga Sutras consisting of: Dharana, Dhyana and Samadhi are the contemplation and meditation that result in the final stage of union with the One Reality. This would be similar to Underhill’s last stage of mystical experience or union with the Divine.

A major difference between Underhill’s stages of mystical experience and Patanjali’s eight steps of the yogic mystical process is the “dark night of the soul”. Underhill describes this as a complete purification marked by helplessness, confusion and absence of God’s presence. For Patanjali, the mystical yogi has prepared for this through the purification of mind and body, so there is not quite the despair that is evident in the “dark night of the soul”. But in both processes the individual mystic does have to let go of the ego in order to reach Samadhi or union with God.
In conclusion, a mystic is really anyone who has had these mystical experiences. If you have had direct experience of God or Divinity, whether through your intuition or direct awareness, than you are a mystic. So what then is a modern day mystic? First of all, I came up with the phrase “modern day mystic” when I wrote my book, To Jill with Love, Memoirs of a Modern Day Mystic. Then later after my book was published, I noticed that Thomas Lyons also uses this phrase in his book, Modern Day Mystic: A Psychic & Spiritual Journey Through A Not Quite Ordinary Life. To quote from his book: "A mystic is someone whose very existence is an immersion in the Divine Mysteries of Life."

According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, the word "modern" comes from the Latin "modo" meaning "just now" and from "modus" meaning "measure". "Modern" is defined as that "which relates to the present and may involve recent techniques, methods and ideas". So a definition for a "modern day mystic" could be: "someone who practices mysticism in the present day and may utilize recent innovations, techniques, methods or ideas." Why is this important? Because a modern day mystic has to communicate his or her mystical experiences through present day culture, religion and technology. Things are different now than they were in the past. We have become a more global society due to new technology and transportation. I am more aware of other countries, religions and nations than my grandparents were. I can turn on the TV and see what is happening on the other side of the world instantly. I think this has given arise to a more global consciousness. And part of that global consciousness is a more expansive view of oneself and the world. Ancient mystics were more restricted in communicating their mystical experiences through their specific culture and religion. Now as a global society, we are much more aware of other religions and mystical practices. Also with advances in technology, we understand the universe differently than we did in the past. Through the advent of Quantum physics, scientists have redefined the nature of matter and energy. The universe is not what it appears (what many mystics have said all along), it is really an illusion. When we observe matter closely, it is not solid at all, but actually consists of electrons and protons swirling in a magnetic field. The table that I lean upon, may seem solid to my senses, but in reality is far from it. So as technology progresses, our understanding of the universe changes and it is up to the modern day mystics to share how the divine manifests in the present day and age.

A modern day mystic knows the universal mystical reality that is the source behind all creation and a modern day mystic never loses sight of the truth which is very ancient, but ever experienced anew.

For further information, see: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mysticism, http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/mysticism, and see Evelyn Underhill’s Mysticism: A Study of the Nature and Development of Man's Spiritual Consciousness, Thomas Lyon’s Modern Day Mystic, A Psychic & Spiritual Journey Through a Not Quite A Ordinary Life, http://www.yogamovement.com/resources/patanjali.html, and see: Jill Lowy, To Jill With Love, Memoirs of a Modern Day Mystic.

The Power of Positive Thinking

Think Positive! It is very easy to say that, but it can be very difficult to do. We have so many problems confronting us on a daily basis, which can be so negative that it can be hard to stay positive. But it is important to try to be positive, even if you are not feeling that way. Why? Let me tell you a story. A few years ago, I moved to Vermont after living in Chicago many years. I had no job and very little money. After a few months, all of my money was about gone and the rent was overdue. I was getting pressure from everywhere to pay my bills. During the midst of my troubles, I applied for a job position as a Counselor with the Department of Human Services. During the day of my application, the human resource person told me that there were over one hundred applicants for the job position. I could not believe it! What chance would I ever have at securing this job? I felt more depressed and very half-heartedly completed the application with very little hope at getting it. I went home and spoke to my friend about it. He could see that I was feeling very doubtful about my chances at getting the job. He told me that I needed to change my attitude. I argued that it was not realistic! There were all these other applicants with much more experience than me applying for this job. How would I ever have any chance at all? He patiently told me that I needed to be open to the possibility that I could get that job. I was still pessimistic, but I agreed to give it a try. So I opened myself to the possibility and prayed to God to help me. The following week I received a call from the Department of Human Services scheduling me for a job interview. I was blown away! Out of all those people, I was chosen for an interview. Well needless to say, I interviewed well and got the job. There was no way I would have gotten that job, if I had not changed my thinking and my attitude. It was an important lesson.

From an esoteric perspective, the reason it is important to think positive is because matter follows thought. There are three planes of existence in the universe. They are the physical, astral and mental planes. Manifestation begins on the higher planes as a thought or idea and then manifests on the physical plane. An idea has to manifest on the mental planes before it manifests on the physical plane. When the Wright Brothers began to work on creating the first aircraft, they had to have the idea of flight and it's possibility, before they began making their aircraft. Many people, who were not open to the idea of flight, thought it was silly. They would say things like; If man were meant to fly, he would have wings. Of course, they never flew. One time, a close friend of mine, Steve had this black cat. Steve told me that his cat could do tricks. I had never seen a cat do tricks before. Dogs yes, cats no! Steve said his cat could lay down at his command. I was very doubtful and told Steve that cats are far too independent to do any such thing. We then went to the living room where Steve's cat was sitting on his couch. We both sat next to his cat and Steve told his cat to lie down. Well the cat just sat there and did nothing. I looked at Steve with that I told you so look. Steve immediately said I was being too negative and skeptical, which was interfering with his commands. I said OK, I will be more open to the possibility. So Steve told his cat again to lie down. Well, his cat just plopped right down on the couch. It was very impressive! But what impressed me even more was how my skepticism was working as a real force to prevent Steve's cat from performing his trick. It showed me how important it is to keep an open and positive mind. Negativity is a real force that can cause negative things to happen. That is why it is soooo important to think positive in all that you are trying to accomplish in this world. It is also important to be aware of other people's negativity, especially when they are unaware of it. If you can help them to become aware of their attitude and guide them towards being more positive, you will be doing them (and yourself) a great service.

Many famous Yogis emphasize the power of positive thinking. See Paramahansa Yogananada’s many books at: http://bookstore.yogananda-srf.org/ and Swami Vishnudevananda’s: http://www.sivananda.eu/en/sivananda-yoga/the-yoga-masters.html. Also see the entertaining books by Norman Vincent Peale, who many consider the Father of Positive Thinking: http://normanvincentpeale.wwwhubs.com/